A Few Things About Me...

Favorites

Fruit: Pineapple; Peach; Strawberry

Flower: Daffodil; Rose

Ice Cream: Any kind of Chocolate Brownie; Cake Batter with Cookie Dough at Cold Stone

Restaurant: Chili's; Ihop

Sport: Don't have one, maybe volleyball to play and hockey to watch?

Number: 2; 22

Soda: Cream Soda; Cherry and Vanilla Coke

Song: "Your Ex-Lover is Dead" by Stars, "This is Twice Now" by Lydia, "Telescope Eyes" by Eisley, "I Will Follow You Into the Dark" by Death Cab for Cutie, "Gravity" by Sara Bareilles

Color: Turquoise

Saying: "Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today." - James Dean

Actor: Johnny Depp

Alcoholic Drink: I don't drink, so how about a non-alchoholic Pina Colada - I ♥ Pina Colada

Sight: Anything fascinating or of beauty

Smell: Coconut; Vanilla; Cinnamon; Fresh-baked cookies

Breakfast food: I ♥ Breakfast, all of it

Favorite possession: Hmmm, things I've made collections of: movies, books, clothes, shoes, photos

Mall store: Forever 21

Fast food restaurant: Carl's Jr., Wendy's

Comedian: Jim Carrey

Sandlot or Little Rascals: That's a hard one! But, Little Rascals

Holiday: Halloween and Christmas

Hard Candy: Caramel Apple Pops

Cartoon Character: The Little Mermaid

Kind of pants: Skinny Jeans

Do you...

Hold grudges: Unfortunately yes

Play an instrument: No, I wish

Read the newspaper: I read news articles all the time, but usually on the internet

Believe in ghosts: Kind of

Have an obsession: I suppose

Like winning: Of course it's nice, but it's not everything

Like waiting: Definitely not

Have freckles: Yep, or at least I did, I don't think they're very visible anymore

Snore: Not really

Believe in love at first sight: Kind of, I believe in chemistry and attraction between two people and being able to tell if you're meant to be together

Wear contacts or glasses: Contacts

Like yourself: Usually

Get along with your family?: Yes

Do you wish you lived somewhere else?: I don't mind it here, but I wouldn't mind seeing other places as well, especially somewhere that isn't so hot and cold! Some places that I wouldn't mind living: Seattle, WA. Portland, OR. California. Canada. England.

Do you like roller coasters?: Absolutely!

Enjoy spending time with your Mom?: Yes

Ever think about the price of gasoline?: Of course, but only when I need to fill up my tank, or if prices are extremely high at the moment

Sleep with a fan on?: Yes, in the summer I have to be cool and then wrap myself in my blanket

Have a good handle on spelling?: Yes, I've always been good at spelling

Ever type "kik" instead of "lol"?: I don't use abbreviated phrases

Know how to play chess?: No, it intimidates me

Want to get married?: Yes

Ever miss being a little kid?: Of course

Like seafood?: No, I don't care for it, but I'll try anything once

This/That?

ocean/pools: Ocean to look at and be by, pools to swim in, because it's slightly scary to swim in the ocean

cats/dogs: Dogs, but I'm allergic

coke/pepsi: Coke

summer/winter: Winter

sugar/salt: Sugar

pen/pencil: Pen

silver/gold: Silver

ketchup/mustard: Mustard

pants/shorts: Pants

math/art: Both, I am better at math, but I enjoy art

sunrise/sunset: Sunset

Chocolate/Vanilla: Chocolate

Big Mac/Whopper: Big Mac? I don't think I've tried either

Beer/Wine: Wine?

Coffee/Tea: Tea

Apple Juice/Orange Juice: Orange Juice

Facebook/Myspace: Facebook

Boxers/Briefs: Boxers

Rain/Shine: Rain

Chips/Popcorn: Chips

Plane/Boat: Boat

Walk/Drive: Drive

Movie/Play: Movie

Money/Love: Love

Breakfast/Dinner: Breakfast

Truth/Dare: Truth

Contacts/Glasses: Contacts

Root Beer/Dr. Pepper: Root Beer

Mud/Jell-O wrestling: Jell-O? ha

Skiing/Boarding: Boarding

Diamond/Pearl: Pearl

Phone/in person: In person

Oldest, middle, youngest or only child: Oldest

The Lost Poems

So I knew of a few poems I wrote in my teenage years, but I randomly came across a few others that I found interesting. I know there is also an unfinished one about David Faber and his book, "Because of Romek," and a couple about my grandfather, but I will have to find those and include them later. So here they are, I believe in the order I wrote them:


Our Last Family Portrait

Dark and dreary days go by
As we dig into our past.
I thought it was just another picture,
Who knew it was our last?

We took our last family portrait,
Seems so many years ago.
Just another memory,
I wish it wasn't though.

Flash! And the picture was taken,
Forever our faces engraved.
Who knew these were our last days together,
With a new future being paved.

I want so badly to be back there
With mom and dad together.
But I know our family portrait
Has left me behind forever.


A New Family Portrait

What do you see when you take a look
At the picture that you hold?
Everything is glowing bright
In shades of green and gold.

Everybody is happy,
With a smile on every face.
Seems when you look at this picture,
You'd rather be no other place.

But what do you see when you take off the mask
And really look inside?
You see a girl that's full of fear,
Who wants to run and hide.

It's not the bride who is afraid,
But her daughter to the far right.
She may look happy and cheerful,
But she'd like to disappear out of sight.

For this is the final reminder,
And this girl is deep in shock.
This marriage has bound her life now,
And there's no key to open the lock.

A new family portrait was painted this day,
And you'll have to accept it my dear.
Because no matter how badly you want it,
Your old family will never be here.

So dry the tears from your heart,
And say good-bye to dad.
'Cause we've got a new family portrait,
And you can't live your whole life sad.


Untitled

How do you land so gently
on a branch of leaves?
The branch does not sway
the way you might imagine,
When a crow lands upon it.

The crow sits high above
to take a rest and call
to his friends; it is not
a pleasant noise at all.

Suddenly, this graceful
creature sees a child drop
a crumb; he swoops down
from the branch faster
than you can blink an eye.

And he fights his fellow crow
brothers for the tiny crumb.
He rips and tears with his
beak until he is the victor.

It seems as though this is a
different bird who has ruffled
the feathers of his friends.
He once was a graceful
creature, but now he is vicious.

Can something be both graceful
and vicious?


Six Senses

Do you know the feeling of staring at
the ceiling?
And staying awake through a
sleepless night?

Do you hear what everyone isn't
saying all at once?
The silence is too deafening to
handle.

Do you look through blind eyes at
the world?
Take off your blindfold, child, and
see.

Sometimes life is too difficult to
see or hear,
But lying awake and worrying won't
make you come alive again.

Do you know what it's like to speak
and not be heard?
Your voice isn't strong enough
for them to hear.

They can't see, hear, smell, feel you
dying right in front of them.
But don't die inside, they will be
unmasked before long and they
will see you for who you are.


Untitled

The way you are, the way you speak,
the way you dance, the way you think
Doesn't have to be the same as
everyone else out there.
There are too many people in this
world who try to act the same.
Add some variety, be yourself,
do what you want, be different
Because where you are, what you see,
how you feel, why you breathe
Is beautiful.
Dance in the rain, sing in the shower,
play with toys, smile at everyone,
hug your brother, love your friends,
always keep your family in your heart, be happy
This is who you are.
Don't feel stupid, let your inner
child come out, don't hold it in anymore.
Scream! Let loose! Have fun!
Do what you feel, live in the moment.
You say they're laughing at you?
They wish they could be like you.
Their masks suffocate their souls.
But you, you're beautiful.

These Are a Few of My Favorite Things...

Black and white photos
Cameras
Pictures
Photography
Bokeh
WeHeartIt.com
Hearts
Stars
Polka-dots
Chocolate
Ice Cream
Raspberry jelly-filled donuts
Cherry popsicles
Orange creamsicles
Pina Colada-flavored things
Snowcones
Strawberries
Peaches
Rainy days
Cherry pie
Snow
Butterflies
Hippos
Puppies (especially Maltese and Miniature Schnauzers)
The Ocean
Monkeys
Magic 8 Balls
Singing
Music
Europe (I want to go to England, France, and Italy)
Family
Boyfriends
Cream Soda
Cherry Coke
Harry Potter
Roald Dahl
Twilight
Funny actors (such as Jim Carrey, Will Ferrell, Owen Wilson, Ben Stiller)
Jay Leno's Monday Night Headlines
TV shows
Learning something new
History
Kids
Candy
Ridiculously stupid/funny movie quotes that never fail to make me laugh
Johnny Depp
Vanilla scent
Cotton Candy
Coconut scent
People that make me laugh and smile
Quotes
Poems
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Disney movies
Disney princesses
The Little Mermaid
The Lion King
Disneyland
Roller Coasters
Memories
Mermaids
Faeries
Koalas
People with cool accents
Mad Libs
Board Games
Laughter and happiness
Skinny jeans
Cute shoes
Lazy days
Turquoise
Nice people
Flowers
Movies
Ross (the store)
Pineapple
Pickles
Making lists, like this one
Fortune cookies
IHOP
Chili's
Dr. Seuss
Edgar Allan Poe
Conan O'Brien
December
Christmas
Laughing :)
Gum
San Diego
My cats (Chewy and Bella)
$5 movie bin at Walmart
Blue Coconut slushies and Cherry Limeades at Sonic
Cherry Coke
Vanilla Coke
Ebay and Amazon
The Library
Fun Dip
Songs
Computers
Facebook
Caramel Apple Pops
Blow Pops
Classic clothing
Vampires
Mexican food
Italian food
Breakfast
Bubbles
Sidewalk chalk
Coloring
The Office
Dwight K. Schrute
Halloween
Math
Forever 21
Plato's Closet
Thrift stores
Fall/Autumn
Pumpkin pie with Cool Whip
Bubblegum machines
Getting the toy out of cereal boxes
Golden Grahams
Bob's soft peppermint sticks
Earrings
Making bead jewelry
Discovery Channel
Watching TV series on DVD
Fairy tales
Children's books
Reading
Fantasy
Stargazing/Astronomy
Astrology
The beach
Candy necklaces
Discovering a new band or song that I love and listening to it a bajillion times in a row

My Life

Well, hello blog, I have no idea what to write, but I shall. I want to use this blog to write about anything I please and my other blog I will use solely for my favorite song lyrics. So..... my life. I don't know what to think of it right now. A lot of changes have happened in the past 6 months or so. I had to make some hard decisions, work has changed from ok to not very pleasant, people have come and gone, I've slowly become unhappy and lost, and I don't know what to do. I do not want to go to school anymore, but I know I should, because I definitely want to move on from what I'm doing now and do something I enjoy. I've always wanted to be a teacher, and I am slowly working towards that. I love children. Is it bad that I like children more than adults? They are wonderful and they don't judge you. They just look up to you and love you and enjoy everything. Not a care in the world. But with adults, there is always superficial small talk, which I hate, and judgment and worries. But of course, it's not all bad, I just simply love children. Maybe I didn't have enough of a childhood. I am usually the oldest of my siblings, my friends, my cousins, my peers, and my classmates, so I have always been more mature and responsible. Even more so than my own mother. But I envy these people and children who seem not to have a care in the world. I have lived my life with constant worrying, stress, anxiety, striving for perfection, and fear of failure. This is a troublesome way to go through life. I would like to enjoy life more. Hopefully everything will work out. And this is how I think it will: Like I was saying before, I am going to school and I want to be a teacher. Someday I'll have my own cute classroom with smiling young children who admire me and who I love to teach. I will continue working at the restaurant I am at now, and if I can't stand it any longer, I will go to another restaurant. I like serving overall as a job while going to school. The tips make for great money that other flexible jobs just can't compare to. I would also like to move out. I think that would help me greatly, to have my own apartment, my own space, my own cute things in each cute room, just the way I envision. But I just need to make sure I can afford it while going to school. And finally, for the last and most important and most complicated thing in my life: love. For the past 5 years, I have gone from one relationship to the next to the next. I have made mistakes and have been confused. But hopefully I have grown from these experiences and true love awaits for me. And so I'm just passing the time and wishing and dreaming and hoping of a life where eveything falls into place.